dayseven, dayeight, and willpower

yesterday went well, three planned meals and nothing in-between. still no workout, but i think that's ok for now. and i weighed-in yesterday at 175.5.

i plan the same for today, three meals, nothing in-between.

it's feeling pretty easy the past few days, kinda wanting a bite here or there but easily getting through. i know that's not always the case, and although i am taking each day, each moment as it comes, i'm not assuming this honeymoon has any lasting power. i've been here before. this dis-ease that i have with food can relax, but it's not going anywhere. if i get lazy, it will be back full-force.

and so, what to do when those intense feelings come back? there's only one way to silence the shitty committee. and contrary to popular belief that willpower is what saves the day, it's totally not. somehow willpower only serves to concentrate the shit, to put a foghorn up to the rationalizations to eat. whiteknuckles are not the way to peace with food. and one bite only leads to a hundred.

there is only one thing to do: surrender. that's the beauty of the food plan; it's either time to eat, or it isn't time to eat. there's nothing more to think about. all foods and all circumstances can be built into that food plan, and if it's on the plan, it's part of your peace. period. if i start to think about it, if i give those negotiations energy and time, i am living in dis-ease, no? if i breathe through it and just say, "it is not time to eat, but it IS time to (whatever)," i am free to go about my real business: living.

for today, anyway.